I Want To Be A Good Mom And A Good Me
Motherhood is amazing, one moment your belly is growing and the next the nurses are giving you a small person to love and lead. And I’m not sure what happens, but something inside of us says, “Hey all attention needs to be focused on the innocent baby we brought home.”
And that’s how it should be, for awhile. Somewhere along the way though, many of us stay in that phase, to the neglect of ourselves, I know I sure did. And the baby grows. And maybe you bring home another sweet, innocent life, and it all starts over again.
Then you look up one day and wonder where you went. You think to yourself, I used to do x, I used to wear y, I used to love z. My husband and I used to go places and do things. But boy does our mind love the status quo and routines, and the sacrificial life has become our new normal.
Well friend, I’m here to tell you that self-care is not selfish. It’s seems counterintuitive but putting yourself first in certain circumstances can be beneficial for the entire family. Your spouse married you because of the light they saw inside of you; they don’t want it diminished.
Your children will grow to love and understand you for your authenticity, your character and your truth; they don’t only want to know certain parts.
It will seem foreign and even unfair sometimes but I promise you that making time for you will be one of the best decisions you’ve ever made. If you like to exercise, make time for it. If you like to write or paint, find a way to get it done.
You can even take it a step further and include your children in the things you love. Let them take some photos on the next nature walk, hand them the whisk in the kitchen, Maybe it’ll be something they love too.
And I know because I’ve been there, feeding my children organic, free range, whole foods while my own health suffers and declines. But I knew something had to change or else I’d slowly go crazy and look up in 15 years wondering what happened.
I want to be a good mom and good me too. And it’s possible. Change is hard, but can be so worthwhile. Take a step back to ask yourself what you need and how you can give it to yourself. Don’t wait on anyone else, just start.
Take a walk or a week long retreat, just start. You’ll wonder why you kept yourself hidden for so long. Your family will adjust and appreciate the newness of you too. Maybe there will be more laughter in your house, more play, more hugs and kisses.
You can be a good mom and a good you, all you have to do is choose to be.